Totally Deleted!

I love the power of the delete button. With one simple click I can make a whole data set disappear from my screen. I thought I was obliterating the data from my computer as well, but I found out that I was wrong. An IT geek that I know informed me that when I delete a file it is only removed from the directory structure and sent to my computer’s trashcan or recycle area, where it can be easily retrieved.

The deleted file remains in the trashcan until it is written over with a new deleted file. But even then the file is not totally deleted. Recovery specialists can still re-create files that have been deleted and overwritten up to 10 times. Not even reformatting your computer will ensure that everything is totally deleted.

There are data deletion tools that act on your computer files like a paper shredder, pulverizing the file into bits and scattering and rearranging them so that it becomes very difficult to reassemble the original file. However, even these deletion tools cannot always totally delete file information. The only sure way to permanently delete data is to destroy the hard disk.

Our human mind often holds onto data that we would really like to delete. Especially at this holiday season when we are approaching the New Year, it is natural to look forward with anticipation, but too often, also to look back with regrets. Increasingly as I talk with people, I find more of them struggling with regrets that they can't totally delete.

When they should have hope for their future they're stuck with remorse for their past. They’re plagued by thoughts like: “If only I'd…,” “What was I thinking?” “I wish I'd never…,” “Why did I do that?” These self-condemning thoughts recycle in their minds, robbing them of peace, hope and joy. It becomes impossible for them to move forward. They can’t give themselves a break because they are stuck with data from their past.

Father God designed the human mind and He understands how our mistakes and remorse make lasting imprints on our thoughts and create negative feelings about ourselves. He has a perfect program to set us free by totally deleting our past regrets. The program is called “forgiveness.”

Father God assures us: “For as high as the heavens are above the earth so great is His love for those who reverence Him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.” (Psalms 103:11–12) He completely forgives us and removes our mistakes and regrets from His memory.

But He doesn't stop there. He totally deletes that self-condemning data from our memory as well. He promises: “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.” (Ezekiel 36:26) He completely replaces our old heart that is indelibly imprinted with our mistakes, and gives us a brand-new heart free of all remorse and regret. We have a “clean slate,” and can look forward to our future with hope and joyful expectation!

If you find yourself recycling a lot of old data as you approach the New Year, why not let Father God totally delete those old files, give you a new heart and put His Spirit within you? Only He can set you free permanently!

Please join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM for worship and a powerful message as we close out this year with thankful hearts.

Pastor Che

Overcoming Love

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”
Martin Luther King Jr.

I stared at these words quoted in a tweet from NBC reporter, Ann Curry, a few days ago. I was still struggling to comprehend the horrific tragedy that had occurred at the elementary school in Newtown, Connecticut. That anyone would break into a school and shoot innocent 6 and 7-year-old children was beyond my understanding.

Like most Americans hearing the news, I wanted to hold my children and grandchildren close, thank God for their safety, and offer some type of comfort and consolation to the grieving families in Newtown. In her tweet, I could see that Ann Curry was suggesting a powerful way to overcome the evil represented in that act of terror, by responding with kindness. She called the proposal, “26 Acts of Kindness,” and stated, “Please consider performing 26 acts of kindness in memory of the Sandy Hook victims.”

Her suggestion immediately went viral and responses began to pour in, as hundreds of thousands of people worldwide chose to respond to the evil act with good. One person tweeted they were buying homeless people lodging and breakfast. Another person was leaving anonymous gift cards on cars in a parking lot. A Texas man bought coffee for everyone in the city of Newtown. A group of women in Atlanta were collecting teddy bears for all 400 children in the school. A young child reported buying school lunch for a friend who had no money. Someone else was putting money in expired parking meters.

On and on it went, people doing random acts of kindness for strangers and most of the time doing them anonymously. What a wonderful way to drive back darkness and hate, with the light and love of kindness and good acts! So simple and yet so powerful! Immediately I thought of Romans 12:21 which says, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

I began thinking about the first Christmas and the hardships that Israel faced under Roman rule. Imagine for a moment being a conquered people, having your city occupied by foreign troops, and being commanded to participate in a census that you know is going to increase your taxes. Many of your rights have been taken from you, but you have no recourse. There are no laws to protect you.

Imagine how dark and despairing your life would be. Constant oppression with no way out. But Father God was not overwhelmed by the cruelty and evil represented in the Roman Empire. He possesses a love that overcomes all evil no matter how great. His response was to send His Son, Jesus, to become one of us, so He could show us the heart of the Father, and demonstrate the overcoming power of the Father's love.

Christmas is a love gift from God to each one of us. He says to us in our times of personal discouragement, disappointment, pain and despair, “My love for you is more powerful than any evil or darkness you can ever face. My love for you is everlasting and I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5) He promises us in Romans 8:37, “In everything we are more than overcomers through Christ who loved us and gave Himself for us.”

Say yes to God's overcoming love this Christmas, and let Him show you how that love will drive out the darkness in your life, and in the lives of those you love.

Please join us for a special Christmas program, “The Promise of Christmas” this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We will continue to look at “Mary's Faith, Part III” as we consider how to have a faith-filled Christmas. Merry Christmas to you and your families!

Pastor Che

Birthed in Love

Like many American families, we enjoy the tradition of hanging our stockings on the mantle over the fireplace. When our children became adults, we modified our tradition a bit to begin including their spouses. Every family members’ stocking now hangs under their baby picture. This year we have a new stocking to hang for our little Annabelle. But her picture is a little different; it's a sonogram. You see, Annabelle hasn't been born yet, she's due February 2, 2013.

Despite the fact that she hasn't yet arrived, Annabelle is very much with us, and she is very much a unique person to us. The other day, I was talking with my daughter, Joy, who is Annabelle's mother. She was telling me how she already “knows” Annabelle as an individual, and even though Annabelle has done nothing yet, Joy has fallen completely in love with her. Annabelle already occupies the hearts of both Joy and Kuoching, her husband.

The conversation reminded me of the anticipation and joy that my wife, Sue, and I shared as we waited for the birth of each of our children. And I thought back to that first Christmas and tried to imagine the excitement that Mary and Joseph shared as they waited for the birth of Jesus. How did Mary experience the personhood of God within her? We know His presence was there, for when Mary visited her cousin Elizabeth who was also pregnant, the baby in Elizabeth's womb, the future John the Baptist, leapt for joy at experiencing Jesus in Mary's womb.

We know that God was overjoyed at the birth of His Son, Jesus, for He sent a host of angels to give the birth announcement. But I think that Father God's joy on that first Christmas was also in anticipation of the future births of a whole family of sons and daughters.

We are told in Psalm 139:13–14 a, “You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” And again in Jeremiah 1:5, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born, I set you apart.”

Did you know that you were on God's mind and heart before you were ever born? That He had a plan and a wonderful destiny for you even as you were being conceived and formed before birth? Before you had ever done one thing, Father God was completely in love with you.  No matter what your personal circumstances, you were anticipated; you were wanted; you were birthed in love. God meant for you to come into being, and to be here now.

Why not make this Christmas the most unique one of your life by saying “yes” to the love of your Heavenly Father? Let God spiritually birth you in love and welcome you to His forever family. He is a Father you can completely trust.

Come join us this Sunday for a special Christmas celebration at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. I will be completing the series on “Mary's Faith.”

Pastor Che

The Perfect Gift

With Black Friday and Cyber Monday behind us, we are now in the frenetic homestretch to Christmas, and the search for “the perfect gift.” You know the one I'm talking about. It may be for your spouse, child, parent, fiancé or friend, but you want to get them something that they really like, something that expresses how much they mean to you.

Of course, Madison Avenue and a host of retailers are only too eager to be of help in your decision-making, pitching everything from Mercedes to the latest tech toys to this season's new perfume. They flood television commercials, online pop-ups and billboards with pictures of overjoyed Christmas recipients of their products. They make it look like finding the perfect gift is the easiest thing you can do.

Personally, I've learned after years of varying success, that I can't always identify the perfect gift. For instance, it's taken time, but I know when it comes to my wife, Sue, that I'm far more likely to hit upon the perfect gift if its sentimental, rather than clothes or perfume. This knowledge has come only through experience, and unfortunately more than a few disappointing Christmas gifts.

As a parent, the perfect gift for me was watching my children's excitement as they opened that special present which contained the toy they wanted most. We always tried to capture the moment on camera, and now that our children are grown, those memories are priceless. Now I get to share those precious moments with grandkids.

Every year as we gather around the tree surrounded by presents and full of anticipation, I am reminded that the most perfect gift will never appear under the Christmas tree. It's actually an ancient gift, given 2000 years ago, but still continues giving today. It is the gift Father God presented on the very first Christmas, the gift of His Son, Jesus Christ. It was a gift that cost Him everything, but He spared no expense, for we mean that much to Him.

In giving His Son, Father God wanted us to be assured that He loves us so much that He would never deny us any good thing. Scripture states it plainly in Romans 8:32, “He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?”

Have you ever wondered what is the perfect gift you can give to God? After all, He's “the Guy with everything,” right? Actually, you have something to give that He desires so very much. Like any loving parent, Father God wants to see our joy as we accept His gift and allow Him to give us all the blessings He desires to pour out upon us.

This Christmas, give the perfect gift to the One who deserves it most. Give yourself, your heart and your loving trust to Father God. Put a smile on His face and let Him show you how very much you mean to Him.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM for a special worship and Christmas service. We are continuing our present series, “A Faith Filled Christmas.” We will look again at “Mary's Faith, Part II,” and see how this young woman presented her perfect gift to God.

Pastor Che

The Promise Keeper

Jonathan was a seasoned veteran, having been in numerous missions behind enemy lines. But this encounter would be different. This is what they had been planning and strategizing for years: the ultimate invasion campaign. All the battles of the past were just the prelude to this place and this moment.

Jonathan marveled at the brilliance and integrity of the Leader. Through what many would consider multiple discouragements, the Leader never wavered, never lost sight of his intention, always confident of ultimate victory. The Leader was admired by all the troops, and they would do anything for him.

What Jonathan couldn't figure out was why the Leader would spend so much time and energy, sparing no expense, to repeatedly help this group of people. They certainly weren't loyal to him, and there was no way they could ever repay the Leader for all he had done. In fact, they often took the Leader’s efforts on their behalf for granted.

As he looked back on it, there was a well-ingrained pattern. The Leader had promised to assist and protect these people, and even though they never took their agreement with him seriously, the Leader never went back on his word to them. These people would get in a crisis, send pleas for assistance, and the Leader would always respond and meet their need. These people would be grateful, but only for short time, rapidly becoming indifferent, and often even resentful or insulting. After a while, their poor choices would get them in another bad situation and they would appeal to the Leader again for help.

Jonathan remembered the time he shared his observations with Daniel, the battalion commander and one of the fiercest combatants on the battlefield. “These people don't deserve the Leader’s time. They don't appreciate what the Leader does for them. Why doesn't he just shake them off and let them go?”

Daniel's answer was swift. “He wants these people to trust him and believe his word. He never breaks a promise to anyone.”

“But just look at all the energy and resources he's wasting on them,” Jonathan countered. “Think of all the times we've brought provisions to them, food and water in covert operations, assisting them in battle so they could overthrow their oppressors. What tribute has the Leader ever gotten from them for all his efforts?”

Daniel's eyes softened, as he put his hand on Jonathan’s shoulder. “You forget Jonathan, they are his estranged family. The Leader is a promise keeper, and as a Father, he will never go back on his word to his children. Never!”

So now they stood shoulder to shoulder, a mighty invasion force waiting for the signal. The first phase of the invasion campaign, a covert operation, had been successfully completed several months earlier. The ultimate secret weapon was planted behind enemy lines, and this was the moment to reveal it.

As they marched in unison, their feet crossed the time-space dimension, and brilliant light pierced through the curtain of darkness. Immediately they all raised the triumphant invasion announcement: “Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to the people on whom His favor rests.”

All Father God's promises culminate in the secret weapon of His Son, Jesus Christ, coming to Earth and being born as one of us. Christmas is the time we remember that our Father God is the eternal Promise Keeper. He has never broken His word to us, and He wants us to believe and trust Him. (Psalm 145:13; Hebrews 6:18)

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are beginning a new series: “A Faith Filled Christmas.” We will be discussing how believing God's promises builds faith in our relationship with Him. Our topic this week will be: “Mary's Faith, Part I.”

Pastor Che

Guess Who's Coming to Thanksgiving Dinner?

This will definitely not be our typical Thanksgiving. Oh, the family will gather as usual, and there will be turkey and all the traditional trimmings. And since I am Korean, someone will most certainly bring kimchi, and hopefully my favorite noodle dish, jap chae. My daughters, Joy and Mary, will hang around expectantly while I carve the turkey, waiting for the wishbone that they always break to see who gets their wish. And Maddie, our huge English mastiff will, of course, try to make a stealth raid on the table once it's filled with food.

We'll take some time to sit down together, and give everyone an opportunity to share what they are thankful for this year. My 18-month-old grandson and a granddaughter on the way will top my list. Before dinner is ready, we'll watch some football on TV, and after dinner we will either go to a movie (whatever's being currently released) or watch a movie together at home. Then we'll have a second round of turkey and trimmings, before dividing the abundant leftovers into portions for everyone to take home.

But this year, there will be no “guess who's coming to Thanksgiving dinner.” Being pastors, my wife and I normally open our home and abundant Thanksgiving feast to our church members who have nowhere to go. They may be singles or students living far away from family, or members who have no family, or perhaps no means to furnish their own Thanksgiving meal. We never know exactly who will appear on our doorstep prior to dinner, but almost everyone brings something, and the table always overflows with more than enough food.

You see, this year we’re moving right before Thanksgiving, and there will be plenty of boxes vying for space. So, we can only accommodate immediate and extended family. I will miss our church family members and the way the joy, and even the food seems to multiply with their presence. Thanksgiving is such a wonderful time to reflect on our abundance and share it with others.

Typically, as people multiply on our doorstep, I imagine another day, 2000 years ago when Jesus hosted an impromptu dinner for 5000 men and their families. The people had been listening to Him teach for some time, and they were tired and hungry. Jesus turned to his disciples and in essence said, “Guess who's coming to dinner?” He asked them, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?”

The disciples must've thought He had lost his mind. They didn't have enough money to buy food for all these people! They scoured around and looked for food, but only found one boy's lunch of 2 fish and 5 small pieces of bread. Jesus didn't seem the least bit stressed for He knew the Father’s heart. He took the small lunch, and gave thanks to Father God, and told His disciples to distribute it to all the people. The food just kept coming until everyone had eaten, even had seconds, and were well satisfied. There was such an abundance of food that there were 12 baskets of leftovers! (John 6:1–11)

I love that story because it's so beautifully illustrates the abundant goodness of our Father God. With Him, it's never just barely get by.  No matter what we need, just like Thanksgiving, with Father God it's always abundance, more than enough! (2 Corinthians 4:15)

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are continuing our discussion on the goodness of God, completing our series, “Grateful for God's Goodness.” I will be speaking at both services. Happy Thanksgiving!

Pastor Che

Is Change the Only Constant?

My frustration was reaching the breaking point last night as I searched through the fourth box trying to find the other spatula. You see we’re currently in the middle of moving and half the kitchen is already packed up. And of course what you need is always packed, and when you search for it, it's always in the last box!

It seems like we've been moving forever. We are buying a new home and refinancing our current one. To make matters more complicated, my wife's parents have health conditions and are in the process of moving with us into the new home. One of my daughters, her husband and my 18-month-old grandson have moved into our current home, so there are two sets of boxes surrounding us, and that only adds to the confusion.

Even though our current change is a good thing, it’s still unsettling. Last night I found myself thinking, “Is all this hassle really worth it?” We tend to like things to remain constant. We are comfortable with the known and familiar.

A good example of this is the present head coach dilemma facing the Los Angeles Lakers. Coach Mike Brown was fired 2 weeks ago, and everyone was excited about the prospect of former coach Phil Jackson returning. But over the weekend the selection of Mike D'Antoni as head coach was announced, and that has Laker fans upset. Phil Jackson is familiar and highly successful, leading the Lakers to 5 NBA titles. Laker fans were comfortable with the idea of his return, and don't like the change.

I'm reminded of something my father used to tell me, “Change is the only constant.” As unsettling as change is, it keeps happening to us and we can't seem to avoid it or even slow it down. It can be a good thing like watching our children grow up, an unpleasant thing like watching ourselves age, or an expensive thing like trying to keep up with the latest technology. But one thing seems certain, change is inevitable, and sometimes it seems to happen so quickly that we find ourselves longing for something that's constant and unchanging.

But is change the only constant we can count on? Fortunately I know that it's not. Our Father God's presence and promises are eternal and unchanging. God is good and His goodness remains steady and constant. Psalm 136 tells us, “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.” He promises us that no matter what changes we go through, He does not change, and He will never leave us nor forsake us. (Malachi 3:6, Joshua 1:5)

It's great to have the assurance that when everything around us seems to be shaking and uncertain, God's goodness remains. No matter how frustrated or overwhelmed we may feel when confronted with major changes, we can rely on His goodness to provide us with guidance, comfort and strength. We only need to invite Him to partner with us in our life.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. Special guest speaker Randy Clark will speak on God's goodness and how to experience it in our lives every day, as we continue our series on “Grateful for the Goodness of God.”

Pastor Che

Good News in Bad Times

You might say it was bad times, even the worst of times. Due to massive public works projects, and military engagements in distant lands, the government was deeply in debt. We all knew what had to happen. It was inevitable that taxes would rise, and we all wondered how much this time.

We felt very disconnected from those who governed. It seems like an elite few at the top got all the benefits, while the rest of us paid their way. It didn't help either that the politicians didn't share our values or opinions on issues that were important to us. And over time we could see that the government was encroaching on our individual lives in an increasingly disruptive way.

Some of us were fortunate enough to be employed, even if it was in an underpaid, blue-collar, manual labor job. We were grateful for a steady income as many of our friends had been unemployed for a long time, and were having difficulty making ends meet.

Sound familiar? It could be a description of what many people feel today in our culture, but actually it is a description of Israel's situation, dominated by Rome 2000 years ago. Times were tough and good news was scarce, but those blue-collar, manual laborers (better known to us as shepherds) were about to receive the greatest good news ever communicated.

Father God was getting ready to send His gift of salvation and peace to everyone on earth. We've all heard the story of the shepherds visited by angels who announced the birth of Jesus Christ. But do we really understand the gift Father God gave to us?

Salvation is more than a fire escape from hell, and peace is more than the cessation of war. In His infinite goodness, Father God wanted to restore to us everything we lost in the Garden of Eden when we disobeyed Him, and corruption of every kind began to dominate us. He gave us the gift of salvation and peace to offer us a full, unhindered relationship with Him, and wholeness and prosperity in every area of our lives.

This gift is independent of our circumstances and we can receive it even in bad times. Father God only asks that we trust and believe His word and promise, and continually seek Him with our whole heart. (Hebrews 11:6) He will do the rest.

The last few years have been difficult for many of us in different ways, and many people have become discouraged with unending bad times. We've just been through a prolonged campaign process that seems to have intensified negativity and divisions among us. The election results may have left you with a ray of hope, or extinguished what little hope you felt you had left.

Father God wants to shower you with His goodness that has nothing to do with who sits in the Oval Office, what’s the size of the national debt, or what's the current rate of unemployment.  His goodness is never depleted and never comes to an end. He wants you to experience the gift of His good news even in your bad times.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM.

Pastor Che

An Act of God?

Superstorm Sandy has dominated the news for nearly a week now. It is the worst hurricane to hit the northeastern coast in recorded history. Covering an area twice the size of Texas, it has affected 20 Northeastern states from North Carolina to Maine, and inland as far as Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee and Michigan.

Recent statistics list at least 80 deaths and up to 8 million households, who may be without power a week or more. Sandy brought rainfall from 5 1/2 to 12 1/2 inches, snow in various states from 9 to 29 inches, and sustained winds of 40 to 65 mph with gusts up to 90 mph. Storm surges in various coastal towns ranged from 9 to 14 feet above normal, setting a record in New York City.

Forty-six miles of the New York subway still remain underwater. One community, Breezy Point in Queens, was especially hard-hit with over 100 homes lost to a raging fire. Estimates of the damage run as high as $25 billion dollars.

We frequently hear such natural disasters referred to as “acts of God.”  They are even referred to this way in many insurance documents. But is God behind such disasters? Some people even say that natural disasters are judgment from God. Is this God's intention toward us?

Most of us have at least heard of John 3:16 which tells us that God so loved the world that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to give us abundant life. But many of us are not aware of the verse that follows, John 3:17, which states: “For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.” Jesus said of Himself in John 12:47b: I did not come into the world to judge the world, but to save the world.”

Jesus demonstrated his attitude toward destructive storms one day when He was on the Sea of Galilee with His disciples. Galilee is a large lake, 64 square miles and violent storms can arise on it very quickly. They were going to the other side of the lake, and Jesus had fallen asleep in the bow, when a fierce storm arose and began battering the boat. Even though many of them were seasoned fisherman, the disciples became frightened and awakened Jesus with their fearful cries.

Jesus immediately stood up and commanded the wind and the waves to be still, and the storm immediately left. The disciples were in awe, wondering what kind of a person Jesus was! This was obviously a very memorable event as three out of the four Gospel writers recorded it. (Matthew 8:23–27, Mark 4:35–41, Luke 8:22–25)

The creation account in Genesis makes it clear that God created the natural world to function in perfect harmony, without violence or chaotic conditions. He also created human beings to have dominion over the natural world and to take care of it. Unfortunately, when we disobeyed God and sin and corruption entered our human nature, it also entered the natural world as well, bringing natural disasters with it.

In His love for us, Father God desires our good, not our harm or destruction. Superstorm Sandy is not an act of God, but God wants to comfort and heal all of those who have been devastated by Sandy's destruction. Let's share in His heart of goodness by praying for those who have been affected, and sending all the assistance we can.

Please join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are beginning a new series, “Grateful for the Goodness of God,” and my son Gabriel will be speaking on “I Have a Good Father.”

Pastor Che

What's Your Treasure?

I will never forget the first time I heard it. There was the sound of clinking coins and a cash register, and then in the background, the sound of a grinding bass in 7/8 time.

“MONEY!” It was loud, forceful, and unmistakably the voice of David Gilmour of the English band, Pink Floyd. While the bass kept up its grinding rhythm, Gilmour let loose with the following lyrics ;

“Money, get away. Money, get a good job, and you're okay.
Money, it's a gas. Money, grab that cash with both hands and make a stash.
New car, caviar, four-star daydream… Think I'll buy me a football team.
Money, get back. I'm alright Jack. Keep your hands off my stack!

I was still in my teens at the time and totally enamored with the message. I mean wasn't this what life was all about? Wasn't money the central dynamic of everything?

I left my teens a long time ago, but unfortunately the message from that Pink Floyd hit is still quite contemporary. Cultural wisdom tells us that to get ahead financially we must get all the money we can, can all the money we get, and then sit on the can to make sure no one takes anything from us.

That kind of mentality puts money front and center as the ultimate treasure, and the path to wealth and security. But does this work in reality? I wonder how many successful celebrities must crash and burn in front of us before we realize that money brings neither true wealth nor security.

We are designed by God to find security and meaning in relationship, not money. God knows that financial treasure will never satisfy us, but only leave us troubled and void deep within. He tells us to seek a relationship with Him first and foremost, and He will provide everything we need. He wants us to treasure our relationship with Him above all our “stuff.”

The problem for many of us is that this is backwards from the way we currently think. We trust our ability to amass wealth to give us security, more than we trust any relationship. So we refuse to take God up on His offer to be our provider.

The Bible records the quandary of a single mother faced with the choice of trusting God, or her own resources. In 1 Kings 17:7–16, we are introduced to a widow who was living during a time of severe drought. She and her son had only enough food for one last meal.

The prophet Elijah was instructed by God to go meet this widow and ask her for some food. The widow informed him that she had only enough for herself and her son. Elijah informed the widow that if she would trust God and prepare a meal for him, God would continue to provide her with food until the drought ended. Although Elijah’s instructions violated all her reasoning, the widow trusted God and said Eli jah first. From that day forward to the end of the drought, she and her son had an ample supply of food. The widows treasure was her relationship with God, and He supplied everything she needed.

What's your treasure, money or relationship with God? It can't be both. One treasure leads to emptiness and discontent, while the other provides satisfaction and security. The choice is up to you.

Please join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. Our current series is “How to Be Blessed Financially,” And my topic this week is “How to Have a Financial Breakthrough.”

Pastor Che

Giving: Love in Action

They are hardly everyday names: Margaret Anne Cargill, Wang Jianlin, Richard Jacobsen and Charles Feeney. Who are they? They are multimillionaires, or in some cases, billionaires who have each donated tens of millions to hundreds of millions of dollars to various charities, universities and research institutes. Unlike their more famous counterparts, these philanthropists elect to make their donations anonymously.

Before you spend time wondering why anyone would donate such vast sums without attaching their name, think about the last time you gave someone a gift. Did you include the sales slip so they knew how much the gift cost? Did you casually drop in conversation your cash outlay? Of course not! The point of your giving was the love and value you place in the person receiving the gift, not how much the gift cost you.

When we love and value someone, we naturally want to give to them, We desire to express our love to them in some way, and even when it may cost us dearly, we still want to give, and do it with joy. In fact, this selfless type of joyful giving is considered a hallmark of love.

We have all heard stories of the single mother, who works several jobs so her children are able to attend college, something she could never do. I remember hearing one well-known personality describe how his father took a second job six months before his 16th birthday, in order to be able to buy him a motorcycle. My own father immigrated to the United States to pastor a Korean church in the DC area, wanting to provide a better life for his family. It took him over two years to get the necessary documentation and funding so my mom and we kids could join him.

Giving is an expression of love. Giving is love in action. The greatest love gift of all time was given by Father God, and it was given to each one of us. John 3:16 tells us: “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only, Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

Father God loves us so much, that He spared no expense, but gave the costliest gift, the life of His Son, Jesus Christ. Scripture makes it clear that He did not do this begrudgingly, but actually the death of His Son pleased Father God. (Isaiah 53:10) He knew that Jesus was taking our sin upon Himself, thereby freeing us forever from the penalty of sin, and making us capable of receiving His love.

We are offered the love of God as a free gift and invited to give His love to others. God loves cheerful givers, those who are so in love with others that they don't stop to count the cost. In 2 Corinthians 9:6–7, we are told: “Now this I say, the person who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and the person who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one of you must give just as they have purposed in their heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”

Only giving that is motivated by love produces joy. Let God fill you with His love today, and discover the joy of putting that love into action through your own selfless giving!

Please join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are beginning a new series, “Supernatural Finances,” and I will be discussing “Five Financial Keys from Solomon.”

Pastor Che

Humble Heroes

In our culture overflowing with reality shows and “videos gone viral,” it's easy to gain instant fame. There seems to be no end to the fascination with the spotlight, and many people will do almost any act, no matter how extreme, to attract public attention. But fame is fleeting, and the public has an extremely short memory.

I'm much more impressed with “humble heroes.” Humility is an admirable quality that is becoming increasingly difficult to find. It’s the attitude of a person who may have done a lot, but doesn't necessarily need to brag about it or call attention to themselves. In fact, they are not concerned with themselves. Their concern is directed to others.

I'd like to tell you about a few notable “humble heroes.” First there's Mary and John Ferraro from Fullerton, California. Mary found out she was carrying quintuplets and was advised by her doctor to do a fetal reduction. This is a common procedure in which several embryos are destroyed in order to assure the viability of the remaining embryos, and provide a safer pregnancy for the mother.

Mary comments: “We decided it was not our place to choose which of our babies would live and which ones would die. If God was giving us five babies, there was a reason. We made a decision to see them as a precious blessing from God above and not as burdens we needed to eliminate.”

I'm happy to report that one week ago, Mary delivered the quintuplets. Mother and all five babies are doing fine.

Then there is a British couple, Pam and Gerald Patterson. They have adopted four children with Down’s syndrome. While most of their friends and neighbors were supportive, some criticized them for adopting so many developmentally delayed children. “They thought we would be swamped by the challenge,” Pam explains. “But actually we've been swamped by the love. These kids have given us so much more than we have ever given them.”

The last humble hero I want to mention is Jim Caveziel. Most of you will recognize him as the actor who portrayed Jesus in “The Passion of the Christ.” What you probably don't know is that he and his wife have adopted two children from China with brain tumors. These children were considered unadoptable because of their illness and their life span is still in question.

Jim explains their decision: “That is what faith is to me; it's action. It's the one who does, and does without bringing attention to themselves.” Jim states, “Our children are the center of our lives. I can't imagine what life would be like without them.”

These humble heroes don't view themselves as extraordinary people, just ordinary people motivated by love. Their willingness to defend the week and helpless, and defend the cause of those who have no voice is inspirational. They are willing to extend themselves and live with the challenges and inconvenience of carrying for others that society might consider “expendable.”

Their lives remind me of another “humble hero:” Jesus Christ. What could be more humble than God in human flesh, coming to Earth as an ordinary person, living and then sacrificing His life on the cross in an act of ultimate love? (Philippians 2:5–8) He died for a human race that often still rejects Him, but He humbly persists in loving us anyway.

He encourages each one of us to accept His unconditional love and become a humble hero by sharing that love with others.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. I am always happy to have my mentor and dear friend, Dr. Peter Wagner as a guest speaker. He will be speaking on “Humility.”

Pastor Che

The Power of One

The first Presidential debate occurred this week, and we are on a countdown to the election. If you're like many people, you may be thinking, “Thank God, the election season is almost over!” Maybe you have voted in many elections, or maybe this is the first time you will be voting. Regardless, do you realize how privileged we are to live in a country where we can take an active part in determining our leadership?

It's easy to discount the importance of our one vote when think about the millions of people who will cast their votes on election day. But do you realize how many times the course of history has been changed by just one vote? Consider these examples:

1645 Oliver Cromwell gains control of England by one vote in Parliament
1649 King Charles I of England is beheaded by a margin of one vote
1868 Pres. Andrew Johnson is spared impeachment by one vote in the Senate
Texas, California, Oregon, Washington, and Idaho were all admitted to the union by a margin of one vote in Congress
1923 The new Nazi party elects its leader, Adolf Hitler, by one vote

God has a habit of doing incredible things through the life of just one person. He used one man, Noah, to save the human race from extinction (Genesis 6:5–8). He took an orphan girl, Esther, and made her queen of Persia to save the Jewish people from being slaughtered (Esther 4:24). He saved a baby boy, Moses, from certain death, made him a Prince of Egypt, and used him to deliver Israel from slavery. (Exodus 1–14).   

Israel Houghton captures our significance well in his song: “Power of One.”

Please don't close your eyes, please don't turn away
Let your voices rise, put love on display
I believe you and me can make a difference now
It all begins with one, the power of one
Joining the hundreds of millions of people believing…
In one, the power of one

As we approach election day, remember the power of one vote, your vote. And most important, never forget the significance of one life, your life to Father God. He intends to change the world through you! 

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. This Sunday is “Pulpit Freedom Sunday,” and I will be discussing important issues to consider in the upcoming election. 

Pastor Che

What's Your Devotion Quotient?

The other day, I was at a good friend's house and as we were rummaging through his storage shed, I noticed a nice golf bag with a nearly new set of clubs. I commented to my friend, “I didn't know you played golf.”

He looked at me rather sheepishly and mumbled, “Yeah, that was sort of a flash in the pan venture.” He paused for a moment and then chuckled more to himself than to me. “You know the golf lifestyle looks so good… beautiful fairways in gorgeous vacation like settings. A leisurely day spent with friends, ending at the clubhouse with a nice lunch or dinner. It seemed like the perfect past time to take up.”

He walked over and picked up the golf bag. “So on the advice of a golf pro I bought these clubs and started taking lessons. But I found out it wasn't everything I thought it would be. For starters, golf didn't come easy for me, and even with lessons my progress was slow. I thought I would really like it, but quite frankly most of the time I was just plain frustrated. I began to realize that if I was to ever be proficient at the game, I was going to have to give golf a lot of my time, much more time than I bargained for.”

He paused and chuckled again, dropping the bag back onto the floor. “Yeah, it was a real flash in the pan venture.”

I smiled to myself as my friend shared his story, remembering two exercise machines I had at home that now lay collecting dust. At the time I bought them, I was convinced they would give me the rock hard abs I saw on TV. But the commercials neglected to emphasize how much effort the exercises would actually involve, even with the “magic machines.”

I think if most of us are honest, we can identify one or more “flash in the pan ventures,” things which were terribly exciting at the time, but which quickly lost their allure. We thought we would be committed to them, but in actuality our “devotion quotient” was not high enough to sustain our interest. It's easy to be intrigued with something new, only to find out it is much more difficult to sustain effort in the face of difficulty or challenge.

Jesus understood this tendency in our human makeup very well. He told His disciples: “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, saying, ‘This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.’ In the same way any of you who does not consider the cost, cannot be my disciple.” (Matthew 14:28–30; 33)

No one could ever accuse Jesus of false advertising. He repeatedly promises to give us abundant life, and He honestly tells us that similar to acquiring any skill, operating in abundant life requires our time and energy. In order to learn how to access and walk in abundant life, we must be committed to following Him, seeking His counsel and obeying His promptings.

We all want “the good life.” But what's your devotion quotient? Are you willing to count the cost of walking in the abundant life Jesus promised?

Please come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. Our own Pastor Karl Malouff will be discussing “Promotion through Devotion,” another message in our current series, “Promotion in the Lord.”

Children of Light

Ever had someone in your life who was totally irritating, or even worse, actually hated you?  How did you handle that person?  I want to share a beautiful letter I received last week from India that describes how one of our HIM pastors dealt with just this type of difficult situation.

“Mr. A., a devout Hindu, hated his neighbor, Pastor D, with a passion, and looked for ways to destroy his life. He vowed to ruin Pastor D’s name and discredit his ministry. Mr A was constantly hurling insults at Pastor D and trying to stir up trouble in the neighborhood.

He made life very unpleasant for Pastor D, but even though it was difficult, Pastor D was friendly to Mr. A. The Pastor and his church chose to pray for Mr.A regularly.

A year later Pastor D was surprised to get a phone call from the wife of Mr. A. She was crying and frantically begging Pastor D to come quickly to the hospital. Pastor D initially was hesitant to open himself to further abuse by Mr.A, but he agreed to go and took some of his church elders with him.

Mr. A had kidney failure and had been receiving weekly dialysis treatments at the hospital for months. But this particular day, the doctor informed his wife that Mr. A’s kidney was not able to handle dialysis anymore and all his organs were beginning to shut down. He gave Mr A only a few hours to live.

Entering the hospital room, Pastor D encountered a very different Mr. A. There were tears streaming down his face as looked up at Pastor D, begged for forgiveness and asked for a blessing.

Pastor D prayed, "Lord Jesus Christ, just as You have forgiven us our sins, we are called to forgive others...so I along with my church forgive Mr. A. In your name Christ, we release healing along with forgiveness and freedom to Mr.A.”

The next morning was Sunday, and the doctor visited Mr. A. expecting to see a dead body. Instead, Mr. A. was dangling his legs from the side of the bed and smiling at the shocked doctor. After running a series of tests, the doctor found no sign of any kidney failure.

Mr. A and his family went straight to Pastor D’s church where Mr. A faced the cross and begged loudly for God to forgive him.  He and his whole family embraced Christ.”

The Pastor concluded his letter: “What did we learn from this ?!!

That as disciples of Christ, we have the authority not only to release

Forgiveness, but to release healing and freedom as well. So lets use our tongue to release His goodness on earth and bless people wherever we are!!”

Think how differently this story would have ended if Pastor D had responded to Mr. A with hatred. As children of God, we have something far more powerful than hatred and revenge.  We have the power to transform others by releasing love and blessing into their lives.

“Live as children of light, for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth.” (Ephesians 5:8) “Let your light so shine before others, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16)

Please come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM.  We will discuss how to walk as children of light in my sermon, “Servant Leaders,” part of our current series, “Promotion in the Lord.”

Gifted for Life

My wife, Sue, has an incredible gift. She is the most encouraging person I have ever met. When our children were in school, Sue always managed to enclose a cheery note in their lunch each day, reminding them how wonderful they were. I travel a lot, and almost always somewhere in my suitcase, Sue has included one or more little love notes with words of encouragement. I'll find them folded in my pajamas or rolled up in my socks, just when I need them.

Sue's gift of encouragement ripples far beyond our family. She never misses an opportunity to thank staff and members of the congregation for the contributions they make. She has an incredible eye for detail, providing praise to the efforts of our most junior members, the young children. Her thoughtfulness flows forth so consistently, and gives her so much joy, that I know it is truly a gift.

One of the things I have learned to appreciate as a pastor, is the various gifts that members of the church bring to each other. When a situation arises, it is wonderful to watch the way people respond with their “giftings.”

For example, if an unwed, pregnant teenager shows up, someone organizes a drive to outfit her with maternity clothes. A member who is a social worker locates free pregnancy services at a local clinic. Another member volunteers to drive her to her clinic appointments, while two members of the youth group offer to be her birth partners and attend Lamaze classes with her. And someone else, who is a vocational nurse, puts her self “on call” to answer any questions about pregnancy or childbirth the “mom to be” might have. A businessman hires her part time to work in his sandwich shop, and the youth group throws her a baby shower.

Each person is offering what comes naturally to them, and what they enjoy doing. Without realizing it, they are gifting this young woman by validating her worth, making her feel welcome and wanted, and including her in the life of the community.

We all have natural interests and abilities or “giftings” that come from God (Ephesians 4:8; James 1:7) We can consume and waste them in selfishness, which leaves us feeling empty and hollow inside, or we can use them to give life to others, and in so doing enhance our own life.

Have you ever noticed how wonderful you feel after you've done an act of kindness to someone in need, no matter how small it might be? Did you ever wonder why it feels so good? When we extend our gifts to meet the needs of others, we are actually offering them life, giving them hope, encouragement, and joy. We are affirming they are valuable to us. We probably aren't aware, but we are doing a priestly act.

Have you ever thought of yourself as a priest? Probably not. But a priest is someone who stands between God and a person, and represents God to them. When we use our gifts to extend life to others, we are representing God to them. By offering life to others, we are actually giving our gift to God, and He shares His joy with us.

Be a priest today! Use your “giftings” to extend life to someone and reap the gift of joy in your own life!

Please join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. Our special guest speaker, prophet and seer, James Goll, will discuss how we live our lives as priests of God in his message titled, “You Were Meant for Ministry: Every Believer of Priest.”

Destined for the Throne?

We are currently in that wonderful time that happens every 4 years, the Summer Olympics, when we get to enjoy fantastic athletics for 2 weeks straight! And every Olympics produces a new set of Olympic royalty, athletes who are thrust into the spotlight and admired around the world. This summer, American Olympic royalty includes familiar names such as Michael Phelps, Kerri Walsh Jennings and Misty May-Treanor, and new names like Gabby Douglas, Missy Franklin, and Allyson Felix.

In fact, the gold medal women's gymnastics team is already slated for a 40-city tour around the United States this fall. Their coach is quoted as saying, “They have no idea what awaits them back in the United States. They are literally American idols as they have reached that level of popularity overnight.” Right now these athletes are certainly household words, and some of them will make millions of dollars off endorsements in the next few years. But no matter how famous they currently are, their reign will be short-lived.

Consider for example, Darra Torres, Matt Biondi, Carl Osburn, Gary Hall Jr., and Jenny Thompson. Remember them? They are 5 of the most medal winning American Olympians of all time. Each one had their moment in the spotlight as Olympic royalty, and their brief reign of fame. Now most of us don't even recognize their names.

There is another type of royalty at the Summer Olympics however, one that has endured for 1140 years. It is the British monarchy, Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles. Unlike Olympic royalty that is based on incredible athletic performance, British royalty is born to the throne. William and Harry were princes the moment they were born, because their father was royalty.

Are you aware that you were created to be royalty? Several places in Scripture we are told that when we say, “Yes,” to God's loving gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, we become, “a royal priesthood,” and “priests and kings unto our God.” And our position is higher than any earthly royalty could ever be.  We are destined for a heavenly throne. Ephesians 2:5b-6 states: “It is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus.”

Our royal standing in Christ Jesus gives us dominion and authority in the earth. This is our birthright in Christ Jesus, and not the result of any performance on our part. We are responsible to use our God-given authority to usher in God's kingdom here on earth. This destiny sets us apart from Olympic royalty and all earthly monarchies. The apostle Paul put it this way in 1 Corinthians 9:25: “Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.”

Are you destined for the throne? God invites you to be a royal son or daughter in His divine forever family. He has reserved a place in the heavenlies for you. Say “Yes” to His gift of salvation and become a Royal today!

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are beginning a new series, “Your Identity in Christ,” and our topic this week will be, “Created to Be Kings.” Come and discover your rights and responsibilities as a divine Royal.

Do Something!

As a pastor, because people come to me so frequently seeking advice and counsel, it would be easy to believe that I know more than I do. I determined years ago when I first entered the ministry, that I would stay teachable, that is, open to consider the wisdom of others no matter who they might be. And over the years I have found that wisdom can come from unlikely sources, even children, and even my dog, Madison.

Madison is our English mastiff. She's light tan in color with a ferocious bark that sounds like she's going to swallow you whole. But that's just show. Madi is really 150 pounds of slobbering affection. When I can, I try to take Madi out for some exercise, which is usually a walk. Not a power walk mind you. Madi and I prefer to saunter leisurely.

A few weeks ago, Madi and I were making the rounds in our neighborhood and came upon a homeless man sitting in the shade of a tree. We were a block away when I spotted him, and I'm ashamed to say I started to cross the street to proceed down the other side, simply to avoid an encounter. But I was too late. Madison also spotted him, and began panting in anticipation, pulling on the leash. You see, Madison loves to meet and greet people. It's hard to resist 150 pounds incessantly pulling on your arm, so I gave in and continued down the sidewalk.

I mumbled, “Hello,” as we approached, but Madison lunged forward planting several huge slobbery dog kisses on his face. I was going to apologize for Madison's behavior, when the man began petting her and laughing out loud.

“That's a great dog you got there,” he said. “What kind of dog is it? I'm not sure I've ever seen a dog that huge!” We spent the next few minutes mostly talking about dogs. I explained how mastiffs are ancient watchdogs, but very loyal and affectionate. He told me about dogs he had owned, mostly shepherd collie mixes. We laughed together as we each exchanged a few humorous stories about our dogs

I suddenly felt very self-conscious, realizing I was talking to a homeless person and I had nothing to offer him. “Hey, I'm really sorry, but I don't have any money on me right now,” I mumbled apologetically. The man immediately replied, “That's okay.” Then he looked up at me with the most sincere blue eyes, and with a soft voice said, “Thanks for the conversation man. I really appreciate it.”

I continued walking with Madi down the sidewalk, but I realized I had just learned a valuable lesson. I only saw the man's poverty and his need for money. Madison saw a human being, someone to greet and give affection to, just like anyone else. All I did was talk with that man, but he appreciated so much the simple act of being seen and interacted with like a regular person.

My wife and I support relief programs around the world, and I travel for our own Harvest International Ministry (HIM), feeding and clothing orphans in a number of countries. But that day I realized that I don't always “see” the poor. I see their needs, but I don't encounter them as unique individuals with something to offer me.

All of us are aware that these are hard economic times and many people are experiencing lack. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, I want to encourage you to do something! It doesn't have to be complicated, or time-consuming. It can be as simple as really seeing the poor person in front of you, and giving a smile and a few words of genuine interaction. God considers our care for the poor a personal loan. “He who is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and the Lord will reward him for what he has done.” (Proverbs 19:17)

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We will be discussing, “Being Christlike by Giving to the Poor.”

Hope Against Hope

The Summer Olympics are one of my favorite athletic events. In the last few weeks, a number of Olympic trials have been held to determine spots on our Olympic team. Despite the fact that these athletes are the best of the best that our country has to offer, only 2 or 3 of them are selected in each event. The odds of any individual athlete making the Olympic team are so miniscule that it is close to hopeless. Yet every athlete who ends up contending at the Olympics, carries the fire of hope against hope within them, that makes them pursue a medal with everything they have. They patiently persevere for years, practicing many hours a day, constantly challenging themselves to build greater skill and ability.

In some ways, our lives are like an Olympic trial. We must persevere day after day, and often year after year facing one difficulty and challenge after another. Sometimes the odds against us seem overwhelming, and we struggle to find the hope that tomorrow will be a better day.

I am reminded of the story of a young man who was cast out of his family. He ended up in a foreign country working for a government official. He had a good job, but unfortunately the official’s wife tried to hustle him. When he turned her down, she framed him, falsely accusing him of rape. Since he was a foreigner, he ended up in prison with no trial date and no possibility of release. Amazingly, his business and organizational skills made him stand out even in prison, and he was given a position of responsibility with some privileges.

Over the course of several years he met many prisoners, one of whom worked for the head of state of that country. When that prisoner was released, he promised the young man he would make some contacts about getting his case reviewed. However several years went by, and the young man did not hear from his former friend. I think you would agree with me, that at that point the young man had every right to throw his hands up in despair and say, “What's the use? I quit!” But he didn't and his situation did change. In the end he came out of prison and ended up as a chief advisor to that head of state.

While that may sound like a storyline for a Hollywood movie, is actually the true story of a young man in the Bible named Joseph. Every time a little bit of sunshine came into his situation, another dark cloud of challenge pounded him down. Yet he still persevered on. What gave him this hope against hope? He had received a promise from God years before about his life, and he held fast to that word.

Joseph knew the truth of Hebrews 6:18–19: “It is impossible for God to lie, and we who have fled to God for refuge have strong encouragement to hold fast the hope that is set before us. We have this hope as a sure and steadfast anchor for our soul.” The apostle Paul put it this way: “I'm still not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energy on this one thing: Forgetting the past, and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us to heaven.” (Philippians 3:13–14)

God has a promise about your destiny and purpose that will fill you with the hope against hope that overcomes every challenge and perseveres to the end. Ask Him for wisdom and He will reveal it to you.

Come join us this Sunday morning at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We are beginning a new series entitled, “Growing in Christlike Character,” and this week we are focusing on, “Growing in Christlike Character through Trials.”

Adolescence: Jekyll or Hyde?

If you are the parent of a teenager, that title probably sounds spot on. Teenagers can be such a study in contrasts from day to day, and even hour to hour. We are all familiar with the famous story of Jekyll and Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. It's the story of a split personality, the mild-mannered Dr. Jekyll who drinks a potion and becomes the wild, reckless Mr. Hyde. Most parents of teenagers, at one time or another, wonder what happened to their “sweet little boy or girl,” who is now often someone they barely recognize.

Surveys done with parents of teenagers, indicate that the most common areas of concern are: teenagers’ negative attitude and lack of respect for parent, teenager doesn't want to participate in family activities, and fails to comply with parents’ rules. Interestingly, surveys done with teenagers indicate their most common difficulties with parents are: too much parental control, parent doesn't listen or respect my opinion, parent is overprotective and invades my privacy.

Parents often complain that their child is a “moving target.” One day their teen seems ready to accept some adult-like responsibility, and the next day they have regressed to a more childlike state. It's difficult to know which person they are going to encounter at any given time. Emotionally, their teen extends and withdraws invitations for interaction like a bouncing ball, leaving parents feeling hassled in a constant push–pull relationship.

Instead of becoming angry, anxious, or nursing hurt feelings, parents would do well to remember that their teen wants to separate and discover their own identity, and wonders if they can survive the need to push away and become their own person. It's an intense inner struggle with powerful conflicting feelings, that often result in teens sending mixed signals to parents.

Instead of reacting by asserting arbitrary control and repressive restrictions, parents will get further by showing their teen respect and continuing to find positive ways to affirm them. If you're a parent, ask yourself, how would I want to be treated if I were my teen? Be honest with yourself. Are you willing to listen to your teen's point of view, even if it is very different from your own? Are you too controlling? For example are you drawing battle lines over trivial matters such as  clothing, hairstyle or the color of fingernails? Do you allow your child a reasonable degree of privacy?

Teens need both acceptance and correction, but it's important to spend your energy on areas that are truly important, for example, their health and safety. Learn to discuss your expectations with your teen, and always give them your reasons for having those expectations. Although you, of course, have the final say, be prepared to listen respectfully to your child's opinion. Always affirm what you can support in what they are saying. This acknowledges to them that you see their growing wisdom and maturity, which is an all-important validation in their ongoing struggle to find their own identity. It puts you both on the same side of the equation, instead of creating an adversarial relationship.

While Scripture affirms parental authority in the home, it warns parents against excessive criticism and punitive control. “Fathers do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. Do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” (Colossians 3:21; Ephesians 6:4)

Adolescence is a difficult time, but it doesn't have to be a negative time for either parents or their teens. It can be a time of positive growth for both.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. Our special guest speaker is Winkie Pratney, an international evangelist and writer from Auckland, New Zealand with a lifetime experience of working with teenagers and young adults.

Through Your Father's Eyes

I remember several things from my childhood about my father. One is that he was an excellent provider. Although he was a pastor, he worked on the side as a dental technician. That additional occupation provided our family a second income and a comfortable standard of living. He was an industrious person and modeled for me the value work. He was also a stickler about time. He always told me, “Che, be prompt and never keep another person waiting. That is the height of disrespect.” I don't think I ever saw my father late to any appointment or event.

I definitely “caught” those two life values from my father. I have always been involved in multiple activities that provide more than one source of income for my family. And I am a very punctual person. I'm never late. In a significant way, the world I now live in, I learned through my father's eyes.

What world did you inherit “through your father's eyes?” I was surprised to discover recently that research on the impact fathers have on their children is a relatively new field. The importance of mothers, of course, has been known for centuries, and much research has been conducted on the influence mothers have on their children. But fathers also make a significant contribution to their children's emotional and psychological health.

Research indicates that mother's interactions with children focus more on nurturing and comforting while fathers tend to stimulate, encourage and challenge their children. Even in infancy, babies whose fathers actively play with them are more confident, bolder and explore their environment more eagerly. Even the stimulating, roughhouse type of play that mothers feel gets children too excited before bedtime, is beneficial to children. Research shows that children engaged in this type of play with their fathers, learn to regulate their feelings and behavior, and over time develop better self-control.

Children whose fathers are actively involved with them as they grow older, display accelerated cognitive development, have higher tested IQs, earn higher grades in school, and go further in their formal education. Starting with simple self-help skills when their children are young, fathers spend more time challenging their children to learn, expecting them to master tasks, and teaching them to be responsible. This influence results in children who are more independent, more motivated to achieve, and have higher self-esteem than children who do not have this type of father input.

Both sons and daughters learn very important things about their role in life and marriage from their fathers. Sons develop an image of what it means to be an adult male who accepts responsibility, is able to make commitments to others and keep them, and treats women with respect and affection. Daughters learn to respect themselves, to know they can make their way in the world, and what qualities to look for in a potential mate.

God understands that we get our view of the world through our father’s eyes. That's why he has taken the role of Heavenly Father for all who will accept His offer of love and salvation through Jesus Christ. He wants to give to each one of us an understanding of who we are through His eyes. We are deeply loved and so highly valued that no price was too dear to restore us to a relationship with Him.

On this Father's Day, if you are a father, realize how incredibly important you are in creating the world your children will live in. And no matter who you are, take a few minutes and see yourself and your world through your Heavenly Father's eyes.

Come join us this Father's Day at 9:00 AM or 11:00 AM. We will be discussing “The Christlike Father,” another in our series, “Christlike Families.”