Family Matters

Every year I log hundreds of thousands of miles as I travel the globe, but there is one trip I always look forward to with great anticipation. Although the destination, Kauai, is gorgeous, what makes this trip so special are my priceless traveling companions, my family. You see, every year my entire family travels with me to Kauai for our family vacation..

As I sit here on the balcony of our timeshare, gazing at the pristine beach and crystal-blue surf, I feel the warm air with a slight breeze. My mind travels back years ago before Sue and I were married. We made the decision to order our life priorities under God’s direction: the Lord first, then our marriage, then our children and family, and last our ministry and careers.

We haven’t always done it perfectly, but we stuck to that commitment because we know that family matters. Long before we were taking family vacations to Hawaii, we started the habit of spending time together as a family. We established routines such as a family devotional time, family meals and a family council where we discussed important decisions we needed to make as a family.

We created a tradition of family rituals around holidays, birthdays and special events like graduations. We made small happenings special, like celebrating a winning soccer game by going out for ice cream. We realized that our relationships would not survive and thrive just on quality time; they needed quantity time as well. We found ways to make time with each of our children through one-on-one “date times,” selecting different children to accompany us on errands and making use of car time for special conversations.

You can tell what people value by what they make time for. Today our four children are grown, three are married and two are parents, making us proud grandparents of our grandson, Justice, and our granddaughter, Annabelle. We still make time together a priority, gathering one night a week for a family meal, sharing pictures and catching each other up on the latest news. We continue our family traditions on holidays and celebrations, and we rally around and mutually support each other in challenging times.

Today I am so blessed as I watch our children choose priorities that make their families matter. I am reminded that family was originally God’s idea. He created us to live, grow and find our identity and purpose in the context of family. He reminds us that He is always thinking of us. In fact, He tells us that His thoughts of us are as numerous as the sands of the sea (Psalm 139:17-18). How’s that for establishing a priority?

Abba God’s family matters to Him, and He has invited all of us to become members.  “See what a great love the Father has towards us, that we should be called the children of God. And that is what we are! We have received the Spirit of sonship, whereby we cry, ‘Abba, Father.’ The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children” (1 John 3:1; Romans 8:15b–16). So never forget that God has a family where you matter!

Please join us this Sunday at 9:30 a.m. or 11:30 a.m. We will have special guest speakers at each service.

Going the Distance

This past week, my wife, Sue, and I, have been celebrating our 35th wedding anniversary with a second honeymoon cruise in the Greek islands. Being alone together, we've been able to look back over our marriage and reminisce about the good times and challenges. In retrospect, we realize that we made some important decisions and established some early habits that enabled us to keep going the distance as a married couple.

The groundwork for a resilient marriage began well before our wedding day. Sue and I were fortunate to attend a church with a strong premarital counseling course that focused on practical issues that grounded us when romance alone might have kept us star-crossed lovers. We were encouraged to discuss our personal values and the influence of our cultural and family backgrounds as well as our visions for the future and the destiny we felt called to. This also included discussions about attitudes to finances, child rearing and how realistic our expectations were in regard to marriage.

Probably the single most important understanding we gained during that time was that marriage, as God intended it, is a covenant, an irrevocable commitment between husband and wife for life. Sue and I prayerfully made the decision that we would embrace our wedding vows as a covenant and that divorce would never be an option.

Early in our marriage, we established maintenance habits that we stuck with even in challenging times when we were tempted to pull back. Some of the most important were having a date night each week, praying and reading Scripture together daily, regular sexual intimacy and commitment to transparency by participating in a monthly marriage accountability group with other pastors. This practice kept us honest, and when we hit a particularly rough spot, we were able to recognize that we needed help and then seek marital counseling from a Christian professional.

Over the years, we have learned that two can never become one, only three can. That is, a man and a woman can never truly become one, unless they each willingly and wholeheartedly submit to a third-party, to Jesus Christ. Sue and I have found that as we each freely put ourselves under obedience to the Lord, we will lovingly lay down our lives for one another in mutual submission.

Personally, I begin each day by asking the Holy Spirit to fill me afresh, for I know that only His love working in me can transform me into the servant-leader He calls me to be. Instead of monitoring Sue’s behaviors, I focus on my heart and my actions, readily asking for and extending forgiveness when we have misunderstandings. These are the attitudes and practices that keep our marriage fresh and vital and allow us to keep going the distance.

I realize that many of you reading this are not currently married, but as Christians, we are all the Bride of Christ. In Ephesians 5:21-33, the relationship of a man and woman in marriage is compared to our union with Christ. When we said “yes” to Christ, we entered into a covenantal relationship with Him, an irrevocable commitment.

We maintain our commitment by daily spending time with the Lord in prayer and meditation on Scripture, desiring deepening intimacy with Him. When we lose focus and drift from Him, we keep short accounts by reconnecting as soon as we discover the breach. And we enjoy the Lord by inviting Him into every area and activity of our lives. These are all important keys to help us keep going the distance in our relationship with Him.

We invite you to our 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM service this Sunday. Pastor Karl Malouff will be giving the message. His sermon is entitled, “Choose Life.”

The Other Unalienable Rights

Happy Fourth of July Weekend!

As we celebrate the founding of our great country with picnics, barbecues and fireworks, we commemorate the date that the Continental Congress approved the final draft of the Declaration of Independence. Many of us can quote the most famous part of that document which begins in the second paragraph. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are, Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.”

Just what is an unalienable right? Thomas Jefferson wanted to make sure it was abundantly clear that the Creator God has given every human absolute rights that cannot be taken away or denied by any government. Therefore they are permanent rights just as the Creator who gave them is permanent.

We are all familiar with the three famous unalienable rights contained in the Declaration of Independence: Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. But did you know that God has given us other unalienable rights? He makes the following unalienable rights available to anyone who will receive them.

The right to be loved and cherished by God. “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” (Jeremiah 31:3)

The right to receive God's grace, His unmerited favor.  “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we who are in Him may receive mercy and find grace to help in times of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)

The right to the guidance of God's Holy Spirit.  “But the Helper, the Holy Spirit Whom the Father will send in my name, He will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all things I have said to you.” (John 14:26)

The right to be righteous and in right standing with God.  “For our sake God made Jesus Christ who knew no sin, to be sin for us, that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.” (2 Corinthian 5:21)

The right to contain the character of God.  “And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another.” (2 Corinthians 3:18)

The right of citizenship in God's kingdom.  “Blessed are those who are humble in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 5:3)

The right to health and personal wholeness.  “The Lord God forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases.” (Psalm 103:3)

The right to be adopted into God's forever family.  “See how great a love Abba God has given to us, that we should be called the children of God, and so we are.” (1 John 3:1)

The right to have all your needs provided.  “God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

The right to have the wisdom of God.  “Who can know the Lord's thoughts? Who knows enough to instruct Him? But we have been given the mind of Christ.” (1 Corinthians 2:16)

This weekend as we celebrate our country’s independence and the freedoms that are ours, let's take time to remember the other unalienable rights that God has given to us. He promises us in John 1:12: “But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become the children of God, even to them that believe on His name.”

If you have never received Christ, say “yes” to Him right now, and step into all your unalienable rights!

Please join us this Sunday at 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM. My son, Pastor Gabriel Ahn will be speaking, and his message is entitled, “Coming into Your Convergence.”

I want to take this opportunity to invite all of you to our annual Fourth of July picnic on Sunday, July 6 from 11:30 AM until 3 PM on the lawn adjacent to Ambassador Auditorium. Come enjoy delicious barbecue, a classic car show and special treats and surprises for the kids. Tickets available for purchase after both services on Sunday.

Pastor Che

Created…… For What?

John and Mary have been married 3 years and are now having one of the most important conversations of their life together. Let's listen in.

John:  You know, Mary, we've done well these past 3 years. Everything is going according to our plan. We both have good jobs and we paid off our cars last year. This year we moved into our new dream house. I think it's time we get a servant to help us clean and cook.

Mary:  That's a great idea John! Let's have a child! They will obey our commands and serve us all the days of their life.

John:  We will feed, clothe and shelter them and in return, every day they will thank us and sing songs about how wonderful we are!

Mary:  We will keep track of their faults and failures and be sure to point them out, so they can improve their performance over time. Having a child will be great!

How would you like to be John and Mary's child? Born to serve. Expected to be thankful for every scrap of food, every night of shelter. Constantly examined for errors, faults and mistakes. Is this why people have children?

Think for a moment. For what reason do most people have children? If you are a parent, for what reason did you have your children? When asked this question, researchers found that the vast majority of parents responded that they had a child for joy, as an expression of their mutual love and from the desire to give life to another. Parents also look forward to being able to instill values in their children and to love and provide for them.

Anyone who has children knows that being a parent is more about giving than it is receiving. Children are expensive. They can break a parent’s heart. They are frequently frustrating and often don't appreciate the sacrifices parents make for them. Yet, in spite of this, parents find plenty to love in their children.

There is the joy of watching their children grow and develop their own skills and unique personality, and on occasion, the glimpses parents see of themselves in their children. There are those moments when they see their children imitating mommy or daddy's behaviors out of admiration. Then, of course, there are the smiles, the hugs and the laughter which lights up the room frequently.

As human parents we understand these things but, strangely, when we consider Abba God, we tend to see His motives more like John and Mary. He created us to obey and serve Him, to worship and praise Him and to be corrected by Him when we fall short. But is this really what God created us for?

Genesis 1:26 states that God created us in His image to be like Him. He wanted us to share His nature and the quality of His divine life with Him. He wanted us to prosper, to spend our life in a loving community He called family and to experience the responsibility and mastery of taking care of the rest of creation.

Revelation 4:11 tells us: “For You created all things, and they exist because You created what pleased You and what You wanted.” Bottom line, Abba God wanted you to come into being, and loving and providing for you gives Him joy!

Come join us this Sunday at 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM as we conclude our series on “Father God Really Loves You!” My sermon this week is titled “Abba God Desires to Bless His Children!”

Pastor Che

All By Myself

I can never forget that sinking feeling I had as a child every report card day. You see, my older sister excelled in academics, but as hard as I tried, I could never measure up. Clutching my report card, I'd approach my father's study with my stomach in tense knots. It was difficult to breathe around the large lump that was already closing my throat. Even before I saw his disapproving scowl, I was fighting back tears.

As my father criticized and berated me for being ignorant and lazy, I felt so utterly alone, like emotionally I was falling off a high cliff. The emptiness of nowhere to go and no one to turn to left me comfortless and deserted inside. Those intense “all by myself” moments dug a deep pit of insecurity within that followed me well into midlife.

I learned to cover up my inner vulnerability with a veneer of self-sufficiency. When I felt all by myself in a situation, I would tough it out and bluff my way through, For years I kept my sense of deep aloneness hidden from others. They looked so confident, I was sure they never experienced “all by myself” moments. After working for years as a pastor dealing with people at many crisis points in life, I now know that we all have repeated times when we feel profoundly “all by myself.”

It may have started when we were the new kid in class being introduced by the teacher, staring at all the other kids and wondering, “Who will be my friend here?” It might have been the time we missed the critical opportunity to shoot the winning hoop or kick the winning field goal, and knew that we alone had let everybody else down.

As adults it may be the moment we come home to divorce papers or have to deliver an important business presentation and don't feel we measure up. May be we are passed over and that job promotion goes to someone else. Some “all by myself” moments are universal, like before surgery when we are waiting to be wheeled into face the knife, or if as an older parent we wait for the birthday phone call that never comes.

Although they really don't work well, we all develop coping mechanisms to deal with those “all by myself” moments. We distract ourselves and try not to think about how we feel. Once the moment has passed, we push back its memory and try to bury it, but it always resurfaces eventually making us uneasy. To compensate, we become as self-sufficient as we possibly can, never realizing we are forging an armor that wards off our reception of love as well as providing protection from feeling vulnerable.

Our attempts to achieve inner security through self-effort will never be successful. “All by myself” moments will always leave us vulnerable because we were not created to be alone. We were created to be loved by Father God, who wants each one of us, His children. He tells us repeatedly, “Fear not!” and assures us that He will never leave or forsake us. “I have called you by name and you are Mine.” (Deuteronomy 31:6; Isaiah 43:1)

To experience the security of His love, we must drop our false sense of self-sufficiency and let Him in. Jesus addressed the superficially self-sufficient church of Laodicea in Revelation by exposing their actual insecurity and urging them to receive His love. “Behold I stand at the door and knock. If anyone will hear My voice and open the door, I will come into him and sup with him and he with Me.”

We are not “all by myself.” We are not orphans. But we must believe Father God's promises and let Him in.

Come join us this Sunday at 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM. We are continuing our series “Father God Really Loves You.” My sermon this week is, “You Are My Child!”

Pastor Che

Fathers Wanted!

Increasingly, the present young generation is a fatherless generation. Some fathers disappear before their child is born, and their identity is unknown. Other fathers are alienated through divorce and disappear over time. Still others are emotionally distant or unavailable due to preoccupation with careers or other personal interests. In some families, fatherlessness is 2 and 3 generations deep.

Here is the legacy of fatherlessness:

• 43% of US children live without their father
• 90% of runaway children are from fatherless homes
• 71% of pregnant teenagers lack a father
• 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes
• 85% of youth with behavioral disorders are fatherless
• 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes
• 85% of youth in prisons are fatherless

These are the voices of fatherless children, now adults looking back:

“My father left when I was 4 or 5. He took that walk for the cigarettes and never came back. We had to go on welfare and eat government food. You know the huge containers of Velveeta cheese.”

“I never went to the park or played games with my dad. In fact, I never did anything with him. He took me 2 weekends a month because my mom insisted, but he didn't want me. I sat in his apartment watching TV, while he was downstairs at the community pool partying with his friends.”

“You can take risks for yourself, but you don't take risks and gamble with your children. I don't think we have the right to take risks with our children.”

“This is the most important job a person can have, that of being a father. Any man lucky enough to have children has got to understand that.”

The punk band, Everclear, has captured the plight of the fatherless in their song “Father of Mine.”

Father of mine
Tell me where you have been
You know I just closed my eyes
My whole world disappeared…
You had my world inside your hand
But you did not seem to know…
Tell me what do you see
When you look back at your wasted life and you don't see me…
My dad he gave me a name
Then he walked away

The lead singer from another punk band, PennyWise, offers this advice to those men who are now fathers, but still struggle with the effects of their own fatherlessness. “If you're from a broken home, it's easy to cling to all that anger. But learn over time to take the anger and make it something positive. We can raise better kids by being more attentive fathers. Maybe that's the way we can create a better world out there, by being better fathers.”

As we celebrate Father's Day this Sunday I encourage every father to remember, no matter the age of your child, they want and need their father. Regardless of how long it's been or what may have happened between you, take the opportunity this Father's Day to reach out and make contact. If you are a fatherless child and you know where your father is, let him know how important he is to you.

Father God knows how important it is for fathers and children to be restored to each other. He tells us in Malachi 4:6 that His desire is to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children and the children to the fathers in order to save society from destruction. Fathers, you are wanted!

Come join us this Father's Day Sunday at our new service times of 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM. We are continuing our current series, “Father God Loves You,” and my sermon is entitled, “Father God Is Love.”

Pastor Che

Becoming Ourselves

Adolescence is widely recognized as a time when the young search for themselves and try to discover their identity. This process usually includes trying on different identities by changing things like dress, hair style and color, behavior, language, music, career goals, peer group etc. Some of these shifting identities are welcomed by parents, many are not, and parents often breathe a sigh of relief when “that stage is over.”

Usually by the time we reach early adulthood, we have established an identity based on factors such as gender, race, nationality, body type, career goals, religion, family loyalties etc. This identity gives us a sense of personal meaning and an understanding of our place in the world. We perform actions consistent with our identity based on our own ideas and others expectations of us. We may refine our identity over time, but seldom radically change it.

While most of us would like to change aspects of our identity, today there are an increasing number of people who are seeking total identity transformation by becoming someone else. Some people are victims of abuse by spouses, parents, family or community members, and a new identity is essential to their survival. Some people seek relief from their indebtedness, legal problems or criminal convictions. Still others like transgenders have so radically altered themselves that their old identity no longer is functional.

There are multiple sites on the Internet that provide information on how to legally obtain a name change, new Social Security number, birth certificate or driver’s license. Some sites give pointers on how to start over from scratch with a new identity by offering people strategies for how to get around difficulties like the absence of personal references, education, employment and credit information.

Other sites urge identity changers to “practice lies” such as using their new name when introducing themselves, and reciting confabulated family, personal and employment histories. They instruct identity changers to adopt new styles of dress, mannerisms, hair color, eye color, engage in a new field of work, cut off all contacts with family and friends, and move to a distant location.

These strategies are time-consuming and costly, requiring intense and sustained effort. Frequently they are only marginally successful, because changing identity is more than an external process. It requires that we become someone new, that is, we change the definition of ourselves and our beliefs about who we are. This inward, psychological change is much more difficult to achieve.

If you are unhappy with aspects of your current identity, Father God has an identity transformation process that is free, complete and doesn't require you to move, abandon your employment or give up contact with those you love. Best of all, it's not a rearranging of external information, but an unveiling of your true identity. 2 Corinthians 5:17 tells us, “Everyone who is in Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone: a new life has begun!”

Father God offers each of us the opportunity to become ourselves by accepting His invitation to receive His love and become a member of His eternal family. He longs to give us our true identity that He established for us from eternity past, before anything else existed!

Please join us this Sunday at our new service times of 9:30 AM or 11:30 AM. Our Special Guest, Jerame Nelson will be speaking on The Baptism of The Fire of God’s Love.

Pastor Che